Hey hey, sports fans (and non-sports-fans)! The Super Bowl is just two days away, which means just one thing: commercials! Well, two things: commercials and football! (And Jennifer Lopez!) Anyway. Surely some of you are excited to see the San Francisco 49ers and the Kansas City Chiefs head to Miami to battle it out in Super Bowl LIV, but if you’re reading this website we’re guessing just as many of you are also stoked to see all of the multimillion-dollar Big Game ads that will air during it.
This year, those commercials are getting a few newcomers. For one, Facebook will be offering up its first Super Bowl ad. For another, presidential candidate Mike Bloomberg and President Trump are both buying airtime during the game—some $10 million worth of it. Each. Ryan Reynolds, meanwhile, is opting to not drop big bucks on an ad and instead give people access to Mint Mobile, the wireless carrier he invested in last year, for free. “I love ads. Except when they cost $5 million for 30 seconds,” Reynolds said in a statement. “So instead of creating a pricey ad trying to convince people to try Mint, we’re going to let them try it for free.” Sound logic. As for the ads that will air Sunday, the best of the best are below.
Amazon, ‘What Did We Do Before Alexa?’
In one of the more self-conscious spots in this year’s lineup, Amazon has made a commercial featuring celebrity power couple Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi that dares to ask the question, “What did we do before Alexa?” The answer, of course, is that before smart speakers we just adjusted our own thermostats, sent our own messages, played our own songs, and told our own jokes. This commercial takes viewers through history and shows them how hard life really was before digital assistants. It was rough out there for court jesters, y’all!
Facebook, ‘Facebook Groups: Chris Rock Is Ready for Lift Off!’
OK, so theoretically, Facebook’s first Super Bowl ad is supposed to promote Facebook Groups. TBH, we can’t help but wonder if this is all some sort of dig at Elon Musk. :shruggie:
The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge on the Run, ‘Big Game Spot’
Also here to joke about how expensive Super Bowl commercials are? SpongeBob. This clip, which teases cameos by Snoop Dogg and Keanu Reeves, is pretty much just a trailer in fast-forward, but if you love SquarePants, it’s for you.
Audi, ‘Audi Presents: Let It Go’
Have you always wanted to see Arya Stark sing the Frozen banger “Let It Go” in the name of environmentalism? Audi is here for you.
Dashlane, ‘Password Paradise’
Dashlane—a service that helps you fill out all kinds of online forms and stuff—knows what it’s like to be stuck in the Hell of Forgotten Passwords. If you think it feels like communicating with Death on the River Styx, then you’re smelling what Dashlane is stepping in. Whatever, this is cute.
Pringles, ‘Rick and Morty Commercial’
Remember when Rick and Morty made a joke about a McDonald’s dipping sauce that had been discontinued in the 1990s and people got so worked up about it the fast food chain actually brought it back? Then, remember how McDonald’s caught heat on social media because it didn’t bring it back long enough? Yeah, well, anyway Pringles probably hopes using Rick and Morty in this commercial will lead to the same kind of rabid response—though, maybe without the backlash.
Squarespace, ‘Winona in Winona’
Maybe we’re big softies, but it’s kind of hard not to be charmed by this ad, wherein Stranger Things star Winona Ryder goes to Winona, Minnesota—her namesake—to build a website about it. “It’s got pictures on it!” she exclaims to the cop that asks her WTF she’s doing sitting on the side of the road. It’s just so pure. Anyway, you can see the actual website here, though it’s hard to tell if Ryder made the whole thing.
Is this another dig at SpaceX? Probably not, but maybe! It's a teaser for Olay’s commercial—which stars Katie Couric, Taraji P. Henson, and Busy Philipps—but the initiative it’s promoting is #MakeSpaceForWomen. Tweet that hashtag and Olay will donate $1 to Girls Who Code. Fire up the Twitter fingers!
Avocados From Mexico, 'The Avocados From Mexico Shopping Network'
Avocados and Molly Ringwald, the chips and guac of Super Bowl commercials.
Hunters, ‘Super Bowl Commercial’
Alexa isn’t the only thing Amazon is promoting during the Big Game. The tech giant is also taking out airtime to promote its new Amazon Prime original Hunters, an “inspired by true events” show about a band of Nazi hunters that formed in New York City in the 1970s. The show, produced by Jordan Peele, begins February 21.
Doritos, ‘The Cool Ranch’
Would you like to see Lil Nas X and Sam Elliott in a dance-off set to “Old Town Road”? We figured you would.
This ad is, ostensibly, a very sweet clip about a man asking Google to help him remember things about his wife. It also serves as a reminder of how much very deeply personal stuff the internet knows about each of us. Google, remember that I said that in case I ever wonder why my identity was stolen.
Budweiser, ‘Typical American’
For years, beer ads have been about average folks having average days drinking average brews. This year, Budweiser’s “Typical American” commercial features people doing extraordinary things—like fighting fires, protesting, and hugging riot police.
Planters, ‘Road Trip’
The death of Mr. Peanut has been much ballyhooed. Does this ad mean it’ll stick? Is the legume certainly dead? Who knows!
Hyundai, ‘Smaht Pahk’
Come, join Chris Evans, John Krasinski, and Rachel Dratch in that time-honored American tradition of making fun of Boston accents. Wicked!
Bud Light, ‘#PostyBar’
Anyone remember the early-1990s show Herman’s Head? It was about all the voices in one guy’s brain as he tried to live his life. It was like Inside Out before Inside Out. Anyway, this commercial is like that but it takes place in Post Malone’s noggin.
Walmart, ‘Famous Visitors’
You know who needs stuff from Walmart even more than you? Aliens. And time-travelers. In Walmart’s first-ever Big Game ad, everyone from teenage Groot to Marvin the Martian shows up to pick up their order from the store. Also featured: characters from Arrival, Flash Gordon, Star Trek, and the Bill & Ted franchise. This is cute.
SodaStream, ‘SodaStream Discovers Water on Mars’
This one is very self-explanatory. It looks like The Martian and every movie about every NASA mission all rolled into one. It also has Bill Nye—and a twist ending that you probably saw coming.